I3lade on Drugs
Written sometime in December 2008 >.> 22:30 <_I3lade> you know eric clapton wrote cocaine? 22:30 <_I3lade> oh damn 22:30 <_I3lade> I mean.... 22:30 <_I3lade> PIE 22:30 <_I3lade> pie is delicious... 22:30 <_I3lade> ... 22:30 <_I3lade> and certainly not meth... 22:30 <_I3lade> ... 22:31 <_I3lade> like The Crystal Method.... 22:31 <_I3lade> WHICH IS A BAND 22:31 <_I3lade> not a drug... 22:31 <_I3lade> .... 22:31 <_I3lade> <_< 22:31 <_I3lade> >_> 22:31 <_I3lade> Heroine... THATS A FEMALE HERO 22:31 <_I3lade> ... 22:31 <_I3lade> also not a drug... 22:31 <_I3lade> ... 22:31 <%Linds> .ud heroin 22:31 <@UB2R-B0T> A white, odorless, bitter crystalline compound, C17H17NO(C2H3O2)2, that is derived from morphine and is a highly addictive narcotic. Also called diacetylmorphine. 22:31 <_I3lade> THATS A LIE 22:31 <%Linds> diff spelling 22:31 <_I3lade> ... 22:31 <_I3lade> SHH 22:32 <_I3lade> I'm not on drugs1 22:32 <_I3lade> ... 22:32 <_I3lade> so anyways 22:32 <_I3lade> how bout them nicks? 22:32 <_I3lade> O_o 22:32 * I3lade twitches 22:32 <%Linds> knicks i3lade... 22:32 <_I3lade> whatever 22:32 <_I3lade> lol 22:32 <%Linds> YOU ARE ON DRUGS 22:32 <%Linds> D: 22:32 <_I3lade> NO! 22:32 <_I3lade> ... 22:32 <_I3lade> after that WHOLE rant, you get that I'm on drugs because I misspelled knicks?! 22:32 <_I3lade> O_o 22:33 <_I3lade> OH 22:33 <_I3lade> I was gonna say.... 22:33 <%Millacus> ok guys, am i old and scary? 22:33 <_I3lade> your not old and scary, or scray and old 22:33 <_I3lade> in fact your neither 22:33 <_I3lade> for the next 3 seconds 22:33 <_I3lade> after which you'll be old and scary though. 22:33 <_I3lade> n_n 22:33 <_I3lade> too late 22:33 <_I3lade> TOO LATE 22:33 <_I3lade> >_> 22:33 <_I3lade> 3 seconds are up 22:34 <_I3lade> ITS FAR TOO LATE 22:34 <_I3lade> .... 22:34 <_I3lade> NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP 22:34 * %Millacus runs around wii rockers room with his wrinkly naked ass. 22:34 * I3lade flips backwards out of his chair 22:34 <_I3lade> ... 22:34 <_I3lade> oh my... 22:34 <_I3lade> O_o 22:34 <_I3lade> ... 22:34 * I3lade pukes a little 22:34 <_I3lade> ... 22:34 <_I3lade> X_x 22:35 * I3lade sticks to the walls and crawls on the ceiling... 22:35 <_I3lade> I'M NOT ON DRUGS GANGSTA 22:35 <_I3lade> ... 22:35 <_I3lade> I CAN FLY! 22:35 <_I3lade> WATCH! 22:35 * I3lade runs off the floor and lands on the ceiling before flopping off the wall and ending up outside in mills arms 22:35 <_I3lade> wtf?! 22:35 <_I3lade> uh oh 22:35 <_I3lade> ... 22:35 * I3lade runs! 22:36 * I3lade runs around the world and back to mill 22:36 <_I3lade> DAMNIT! 22:36 * I3lade runs back in the building and hides on top of a box 22:36 * I3lade eats a carrot 22:36 <_I3lade> <_< 22:36 <_I3lade> >_> 22:36 <_I3lade> NO 22:37 <_I3lade> ONLY BECAUSE THE WEATHER CEASES TO EXIST YOU THINK YOU CAN DO WHATEVER YOU WANT ON THE WATER NET 22:37 <_I3lade> WELL LET ME LEARN YOU SOME BOOKS WALMART 22:37 <_I3lade> IF I DONT GET MY LEMON AT EXACTLY LAMP FIFTY TWO COMPACT DISK 22:37 <_I3lade> I'M GONNA MURDER THE PICKLE JAR WITH THE MASONRY FOUND IN THE OFTEN FORGOTTEN LIVING ROOM 22:38 <_I3lade> dance hula duster dance 22:38 <_I3lade> ! 22:38 <_I3lade> THERES BUTTER ON MY FACE! 22:38 * I3lade looks a eucalyptus leafe.... 22:38 <_I3lade> LEAFE HAS AN E 22:38 <_I3lade> LIKE LEAVESF 22:38 * I3lade jumps on a pencil 22:38 <_I3lade> OMG I BORKED IT! 22:39 * I3lade picks up the pencil and lights it on fire before flying off into the sunset on his purple walrus 22:39 <_I3lade> BUT THATS EXACTLY WHY TEH CURTAINS TRIED TO EAT ME 22:40 <_I3lade> you see, if I dont eat after midnight, I turn into a horrible monitor of death that spews mutant radiation from the speakers of a spark plug deep in the engine of a cylinder on your mothers couch... 22:40 <_I3lade> so if I can just delete that trash can over there... 22:40 <_I3lade> IVE BEEN HAVING AN AFFAIR!!!! 22:40 <_I3lade> with this jar of peanut butter... 22:40 <_I3lade> BUT ITS OK! 22:40 <_I3lade> because I can glow in the dark now 22:40 <_I3lade> so all our troubles are over 22:40 <_I3lade> n_n 22:40 <_I3lade> NOW QUICKLY 22:40 <_I3lade> MILLACUS 22:40 <_I3lade> GET INSIDE THIS ORANGE 22:41 <_I3lade> AND THE REST OF THE KIDS 22:41 <_I3lade> RUN UP THAT TREE 22:41 <_I3lade> I need to build a lampost out of cinnamon buns 22:41 <_I3lade> that might give me enough time to eat the wire... 22:41 <_I3lade> SINCE WHEN WAS THE STEAM ON THE FLOOR?! 22:41 <_I3lade> O 22:41 <_I3lade> M 22:41 <_I3lade> G 22:41 <_I3lade> the amplifier is BATHING AGAIN! 22:42 <_I3lade> quickly! plug in the hair dryer and remove the silica packet!!! 22:42 <_I3lade> but dont eat the hair dryer, it's poisonus! 22:42 <_I3lade> LIKE YOUR MOTHER 22:42 <_I3lade> I'm sorry 22:42 <_I3lade> that was quite uncalled for 22:42 <_I3lade> and the brief return to sanity is over! 22:42 <_I3lade> WEEE!!!!! 22:42 <_I3lade> so this one time I had a screw driver... 22:42 <_I3lade> OOOH SHINEY! 22:42 <_I3lade> are phones SUPPOSED to do that? 22:43 <_I3lade> it looks like it's eating a pachyderm... 22:43 <_I3lade> SINCE WHEN DO KEYBOARDS HAVE EYES!!!!???? 22:43 <_I3lade> ITS STARING AT ME!!! 22:43 <_I3lade> MAKE IT STOP!!! 22:43 <_I3lade> oh wait nvm 22:43 <_I3lade> if you pour vinegar on it it stops 22:43 <_I3lade> magazines! 22:43 <_I3lade> EVERYWHERE 22:43 <_I3lade> POST THE MAGAZINES EVERYWEHRE 22:43 <_I3lade> THEY KEEP THE ALIENS AWAY AT NIGHT 22:44 <_I3lade> QUICKLY!!! TO THE BAT STICK! 22:44 <_I3lade> RUN RUN RUN YOU CANT GET ME IM THE DOG CATCHER MAN 22:44 <_I3lade> GINGERBREAD IS NOT DELICIOUS 22:44 <_I3lade> AS FAST AS YOU CAN! 22:44 <_I3lade> hey look over there! 22:44 <_I3lade> A DISTRACTION! 22:44 <_I3lade> az 22:44 <_I3lade> quickly 22:44 <_I3lade> tell me how old your lime is 22:45 <_I3lade> ... 22:45 <_I3lade> QUICKLY?! 22:45 <_I3lade> OH NO ITS TOO LATE 22:45 <_I3lade> he's foregone into the infinite pit of dispare and madness! BUT WHO KICKED HIM OFF?! 22:45 <_I3lade> ALAS POOR YORICK! IT WAS THEE!!! 22:45 <_az09456> .ud yorick 22:45 <_az09456> >_> 22:45 <@UB2R-B0T> somebody whose humour kills a conversation or party; a person who thinks they are incredibly funny and popular, but who everyone else thinks is a real twat. somebody who laughs at their own jokes, but who no one else finds remotely funny. Derived from the dead clown in Shakespeare's 'Hamlet' 22:45 <_az09456> SEE BLADE? 22:45 <_az09456> THATS YO 22:45 <_az09456> >_> 22:46 * I3lade laughs at his own joke! 22:46 <_I3lade> ITS HIGH LARIOUS! 22:46 <_I3lade> SEE THAT?! 22:46 <_I3lade> I SEPERATED THE WORDS?! 22:46 <_I3lade> NOW! I SHALL FLY INTO THE NIGHT ON MY DEAD HORSE THAT I'VE ALREADY BEATEN TO DEATH MULTIPLE TIMES WITH REDUNDANT STATEMENTS! 22:46 <_I3lade> and when it's all said and done 22:47 <_I3lade> the waffle iron did in fact bake the muffin that destroyed the platypus 22:47 <_I3lade> AND THEN THE DUCK SAID 22:47 <_I3lade> LET THERE BE LIGHT 22:47 <_I3lade> and the flash light sputtered out of existence 22:47 <_I3lade> TO BE OR NOT TO BE?! TEHRE IS NONE SUCH QUESTION 22:47 <_I3lade> FOR I'VE ALREADY ANSWERED NOT THAT 22:47 <_I3lade> BUT INSTEAD THE OTHER QUESTION THAT WAS PREVIOUSLY UNANSWERED 22:48 <_I3lade> SINCE WHEN TO YOUR HAIRS TALK LOUDER THAN YOUR BOOKS?! 22:48 <_I3lade> I CANT TAKE IT ANYMORE 22:48 <_I3lade> YOUR IMAGINARY FRIENDS KEEP ARGUING WITH MY LITTLE VOICES 22:48 <_I3lade> AND I'M GONNA HAVE TO KILL ONE OF THEM 22:48 <_I3lade> and since I can't possibly spell suicide 22:48 <_I3lade> I'll have to marry you instead 22:49 <_I3lade> ALAS! 22:49 <_I3lade> WE HAVE GROWN TOO FAR APART 22:49 <_I3lade> and my previous affairs keep me tied to alaska 22:49 <_I3lade> so I'm afraid we can't stay together... 22:49 <_I3lade> or keep the beef from spoiling! 22:49 <_I3lade> FARE THEE WELL! 22:49 <_I3lade> AWAY TO A NUNNERY WITH YOU!!!! 22:49 <_I3lade> AWAY! 22:49 <_I3lade> ADIEU! 22:50 <_I3lade> I BID THEE LEAVE 22:50 <_I3lade> AND FROM THIS POINT ON 22:50 <_I3lade> THE ORANGE SAID TO THE PINEAPPLE 22:50 <_I3lade> that's why peaches don't get the respect they deserve 22:51 <_I3lade> and pickles will forever shall fortnight in thine breeches away from the uncontested youth of those so uninterested and intertwined with their own shoelaces to bother with the obvious discourtesy that your call imposed 22:51 <_I3lade> HAPPY CHRISTMAS AND MERRY BIRTHDAY TO ALL!! 22:52 <_I3lade> NAMES AHVE THE POWER TO DO THINGS TO YOUR BRAIN THAT NO OTHER THING COULD DO THE EXACT SAME OF TO THE SAME GENERAL AREA OF RELATED INTEREST 22:52 <_I3lade> and since then, I've been clean and free of acetaminophens for the past 4 seconds... 22:52 <_I3lade> BUT NO LONGER 22:52 <_I3lade> MY BROTHERS I BID YOU TO JOIN ME IN WHAT COULD BE THE LAST OF THE FIRST OF THE LEFT ON THE OTHER PERSONS RIGHT 22:53 <_I3lade> since past that there have been thigns 22:53 <_I3lade> THINGS THAT I CANNOT EXPLAIN FOR FEAR OF YOUR EYES LIKE STARS STARTING FROM THEIR VERY SPHERES! 22:53 <_I3lade> AND NO LONGER 22:53 <_I3lade> SHALL I BE HELD CAPTIVE TO THIS HORRIBLE LIE 22:54 <_I3lade> and from the underbelly of that so wretched and foul as to rend the earth and cleft thine ligaments in two! I bring thee... Chestnuts. 22:54 <_I3lade> CHESTNUST 22:54 <_I3lade> CHESTNSUT! 22:54 <_I3lade> CHUSTSNUT! 22:55 <_I3lade> and as the s slowly migrates to the north, it finds a warmer climate to contain it's already enlarged brain. 22:56 <_I3lade> I'm afraid that all that I have had has been used in this, the most futile of attempts, and it is with my last breath that as I lay, grimacing upon my deathbed, I hope that thou taketh my words and place them under key and lock. 22:57 <_I3lade> for this is... 22:59 <_I3lade> AND ALL THE FUN OF BEING A CHINESE MONK IN A MONGOLIAN MONASTERY CAN BE YOURS FOR THE LOW LOW PRICE OF THREE CONSECUTIVE PAYMENTS OF THE FOLLOWING AMOUNT OF MONEY WITH THE INSTALLMENT OF IT INTO MY POCKET. 22:59 <_I3lade> much as the dreaded lebonese stilt monkey 22:59 <_I3lade> from... 22:59 <_I3lade> lebonon 23:00 <_I3lade> WHERE THE ELK AND THE BUFFLOW ROAM FREE 23:00 <_I3lade> and from that point on, I never looked at an apple the same way again. 23:00 <_I3lade> Good day.